Madness
by ApocalypticAndrea
Summary: Akira moved to Sweet Amoris to escape, but now that of what she was trying to hide from has found her and threatens her to leave again. But she can't leave, this is the life she wants, she wants to be with Castiel and everyone else. Will this tear her apart from the only people she feels safe around?
1. Chapter 1

My life is going no where, I say to myself as my head hangs off the sofa, my legs are around his neck and I'm waiting for the drugs to kick in; he didn't hear me, he never does or just never answers. I take another deep breath and sigh.

"Dominic," My head rolls side to side, "When are you going to marry me, Hun?" My legs slide down his sides, and I feel his hand grip them. My head turns to look him in the eye and I feel a wash of relief splash over me, I couldn't help the big smile on my face when I see his ice like eyes and sharp smile. "What would I do with out, Dominic?" I ask and there's a shake in his head as he turns back to his phone. "Talk to me." I demand, crossing my arms on my chest and pouting my face. I keep my eyes on his; he's not looking my way. "Dominic, when are these shrooms going to kick in?" I take my legs off his body and as I stood up I stretched and yawned but not once did he look my way. "What are you doing on here?" I snatched away his phone only to be stopped inches away from him. I let out a gasp and the phone fall back to Dominic' lap.

Dominic' eyes were sharp, like taggers and the look in them; tears streamed down my face the longer I stared at them, but I couldn't look away. My mouth hung open, no words could escape passed the small gasps for breath. Fear stopped my breathing and my heart. I felt no warmth, only cold; everything was so cold and empty.

"Dominic, stop staring at me." I plead out between the short gasps. "Dominic let go of my arm," This is where I start to panic. My head gets light while my vision blurs, I can feel myself wanting to black out but my heart raced a million a second and my breathing was sharp and short while my fingertips tingled with my hands shaking violently. "D-Dominic, please let me go." I manged to whisper, my voice cracked and dried, I let out a whimper. "Dominic, please!"

I pull my arm away with all the strength my weak body could pull out, and I fall into a pit of darkness. Dominic' icy eyes stare at me finally. I can feel my body coming into contact with the bottom.

**splat**

"I'm not Dominic,"A male voice enters through my ears, jolting my body up and off the sofa. My back hits the bare wooden floor and I let out a scream, but my eyes open and I take a look around me. This place wasn't Dominic'.

I start to panic, speaking frantically with worried whimpers. I can feel my eyes about to explode with the tears that piled up. My eyes race around the room, trying to make sense of where I was and who I was with.

The red haired man is speaking to me but I can't hear him, I can only see a blur of his mouth moving. He gets off the sofa and sits next to me and I flinch at the touch of his clothing rubbing slightly on my skin. I just stare at him in fear, with worry.

Where's Dominic, I keep asking myself, where is he, why isn't he here, who are you, why are you here, where am I, why am I here, who am I, what the fuck is going on; they fill up my mind and I can't stop thinking.

"Akira," The make voice breaks through the bubble surrounding me. "Akira, it's okay."

"No it's not," I say quickly.

"Breathe," He says before wrapping his arms around my shoulders. "This is what you need right?" He asks embarrassingly.

"Cas," The word comes out of my mouth without thinking. "Castiel?" I didn't understand what was going on, but I somehow felt safe, I felt like I was in Dominic' arms, but he wasn't Dominic. I was safe and I was okay, I manged to breathe and wipe away the tears from my face. "I'm sorry," I cleared my throat and looked away from his eyes. "Castiel," I had to say his name once more; it felt foreign and familiar all at once.

"Are you okay?" He asks, there's a small tint of red in his cheeks and worry in his eyes and I just nod. "Good."

There's a silence that lingers above us, a comfortable silence. I rested my head on his lap and he places a hand on top of my head and neither of us talked. I feel asleep and woke up on the sofa with a blanket and pillow under my head; Castiel was nowhere to be found.

The next day at school I wondered aimlessly around the hallways. My mind was a mess and all I wanted was a simple cigarette. My body was still weak from yesterday and my hands were cold and still shaking. I felt like everyone knew, everyone knew I was a mess and it made me feel worse. I needed air, I needed time to myself, what I needed to do was get away. My mind started to race, along with my breathing and heart beat. I walked quickly towards the outside doors; I needed air and room to breathe. It hurt, every time I took a deep breath my chest was being stabbed with a knife.

I flew through the double doors and held my bag tightly on my chest; the tear were starting to blur my vision. I blinked and bumped into someone, my ass hit the floor and the tears I was fighting back trailed down my cheeks, staining the concrete ground under me.

"I'm sorry," I chocked out, not looking up to the person I had already known who it was, Lysander. He had been the last person I wanted to see, especially with me like this; why couldn't I have ran into the principal or Amber?

"Akira, is everything alright?" My head did a slight shake without me realizing. I sat down right and rummaged through my bag for cigarettes and a lighter. I placed the cigarette in my mouth but had trouble with the lighter, my hands were shaking violently. I cursed loudly as I started to panic more the longer I felt Lysander's eyes watching me. When I manged to finally turn on the lighter, I also manged to burn my finger.

"Mother fucker," I stressed as the tears filled my eyes once more.

"Here, let me help." Lysander sat in front of me and gently placed his hand over my on the lighter. My eyes watched his face, his calm facial expression put me at ease and calmed my breathing.

"Thanks," I mumbled under my breathe as the smoke escaped from my mouth. I sighed, taking in another big drag and slowly let it out, my eyes never let Lysander's face.

"Should I ask, or is it a secret?" He asked letting his eyes finally meet with mine.

"If I told you, I would have to kill you." I joked with a small chuckle, but the the corners of his lips curved down, he was frowning at my joke. "Don't take it too seriously." I said taking in the smoke.

"Your makeup is smeared." He spoke, his tone monotone.

I grabbed my bag and emptied everything out on the floor in between Lysander and I. I opened my compacted mirror and held it in one hand with my cigarette and fixed my make up with the other hand. Lysander didn't speak, he just watched me with a slightly smile; it made me a little nervous but it was fine.

My eyes looked behind me in the mirror and my heart stopped for a second when I saw Castiel walking towards us. He had a sour look on his face and his hands shoved into his pockets.

"What happened to your face?" My eyebrows furrowed and I frowned angrily, not looking up at him. "Tsk, whatever." I looked up at him once he was looking away from me, he had started a conversation with Lysander but I didn't pay attention to what they were talking about. Lysander left a few seconds later, leaving Castiel and I alone.

I looked up at him from the corner of my eye while I was throwing everything back in my bag. He was standing there awkwardly, his hands still in his pockets and they sour expression was gone but was replaced with something else. He wanted to bring up what happened yesterday, but he didn't know how or if it was a good thing too.

"You can bring it up." I said, my eyes now staring at him. "It's okay, I'm fine."

"Yeah? Well you don't look fine." I frowned, "Red was out before it happened," I had figured that much, usually when I don't have memory of where I am it's because of her. "We were watching some movie and she fell asleep on my lap, after a few minutes," Castiel stopped to clear his throat and to look away. "She started to moan in her sleep, and then she started calling out for a Dominic?" There it was, the name, that devil of a name. "Her, your, whatever, hand reached out and touched my face and she called me Dominic; I told it that wasn't me and that's when you came back." He rubbed the back of his neck, not making eye contact with me. "Who's Dominic?"

"I've never heard the name before, must be some guy she met while she was out." I hated having to lie to Castiel, he was doing no harm to me, but Dominic was someone I didn't want him to know about. I didn't want anyone to know about him.

"Doesn't that worry you? Shouldn't it bother you that she takes your body and does whatever the hell she wants with it?"

"And why does this bother you?" I snapped back at him. This was just a subject I didn't want to talk about. "There's nothing I can do about, she has a mind of her own, I can't control her." I stood up and walked away before I got him angry, more angry.

I tossed the cigarette on the ground before I entered the school and sighed. I thought about what Castiel had said, of course it bothered me, of course I was worried, but there was a part of me that trusted Red and knew she wouldn't do anything too stupid, like have sex with some guy. She wasn't like that, sure she flirts and makes out with strangers but at the end of the day, she doesn't take them home, she doesn't go home with them because she only has eyes for one person, that person being Dominic. Somehow her mind blocked away what happened and she wont believe anything else. When I try to think about it, about the attacks and screams, she stops me.


	2. Chapter 2

Going to class was just a waste, sitting there listening to gibberish wasn't going to help solve why I felt the way I did. So I locked myself in the basement and thought, and thought, and thought until my brain wanted to explode.

"Why do I feel this way," I said to myself with a sigh.

There was another knock on the door, that made three knocks in the past three hours. I never realized how many people came down here. But there was something different about the knock, it was demanding and in a rush. "Castiel," it had to be him and if I didn't open it, I would be getting angry looks all day. I sluggishly dragged my legs up the stairs and unlocked the door. I turned back to walk back down when the door opened and Castiel poked his head in.

"What are you doing in here?" I shrugged. "Where are you going?"

"To sit down, I'm tired and trying to rest." Well, it wasn't a lie but it wasn't the truth, so here I was lying to him once again. "You can join me or when you leave make sure you close the door, please and thank you." The door closed, the creaking of the stairs echoed as Castiel walked down them.

"You need to talk about it." He said sitting down on the floor across from me.

"Are you telling me or asking me?"

"I'm telling you,"

"Of course," I rolled my eyes. "You can't just tell me to talk about it Castiel, especially since I don't know what your saying." There was nothing I needed to talk about, I just needed to be alone with my thoughts. "I need to be alone, I'm sorry." I got up to walk away and Castiel stopped me, grabbing my wrist, pulling me back to face him. He had stood up and there was an annoyed expression on his face, the look was the last thing I saw before seeing blackness.

"What the fuck are you looking at?" I couldn't see anything, but I could hear my own voice. "Take a picture Cassy, it'll last you longer." It was Red, she had finally decided to come out, but why could I hear her? That had to be impossible for this to be happening, it never happened before. "What's wrong, kitty cat got your tongue?" Red teased him with a meow.

"Let Akira out Red, I have to speak to her." Castiel's voice was so cold towards Red.

"I'm sorry, you're shit outta luck Love," I closed my eyes and fell down to my knees, my head was starting to pound. "She doesn't want to talk to you, can't you take a hint?" Wait, what did she mean by that? I opened my eyes and there was a small hint of light on the other side of the black room. I followed it, but the closer I got the more pain was head was taking.

"What do you mean?" Castiel's voice was getting louder the closer I got. "Let her back out."

"No," Red's laugh filled the dark room and the light got stronger. I stepped into it, letting my eyes adjust to it and I cried out with shock. I stood there, I mean Red stood there with her hands on her hip and her hair our natural Red color. She heard me and turned around with a cocky smile on her lips, on my lips. She motioned me to come next to her and said nothing else, she just stared in front of us. "Look, we're a very complicated pair and sometimes we break, well she breaks and we need to be left to do our own thing; that's why I'm here." I turned my head into the black and I saw Castiel's face, I was looking at him inside my own mind. He looked really pissed, his eyebrows furrowed with an angry frown, he had his arms crossed on his chest. "She needs me to let her think, and I give her all the time she needs and when she's done I let her come back. I care too."

"Bullshit," Castiel spat the word out like venom.

"Call me on it, but it's the truth baby," It was weird hearing myself talk to Castiel. It was weird that I was watching myself have a conversation with a guy and I have to power to control what I say. "Whatever, come see her around lunch." Red turned away and I walked back into the dark room; all of this was too much to take in.

I woke up stretching on a bench outside, with a half smoked cigarette still burning in between my lips. I looked around and then to my cell phone, it was lunch time and Red had kept her word. I sat up, rested my elbows on my knees and rubbed my eyes with the palm of my hands. I took one long drag from the cigarette before crushing it under my boot. I sat back and watched the school door, waiting for Castiel to come out. The door finally opened a few minutes later but it was Castiel, it was Lysander. I saw him look around before he found me sitting down and came towards me.

"Hey there," I sat once he was a few feet away.

"You haven't been to class?" He raised an eyebrow, looking down at me waiting for an answer.

"I was napping in the basement and then Red came out and now I'm here." I left out the part about Castiel because Lysander didn't need to know about that.

"Well, Nathaniel is looking for you." I rolled my eyes because I knew it was going to be about my absence in class the past few days.

"Thanks, I'm going to see what he wants." But I didn't want to get on his bad side, he knew to many things about me.

As I was walking back inside, Castiel is coming out, we meet eyes. I gave him a smile and pretending to be fixing a tie, letting him know where I was going. He rolled his eyes and walked away, my head turned around, following him as he walked towards his friend and when my eyes met with Lysander's I quickly turned away and walked inside.

I stopped in the hallway to let me eyes adjust to the florescent lighting that the school had. I made a quick turn into the student council room and found Nathaniel looking over some papers. He hadn't noticed me walk in, he didn't notice me until I was right next to him. He jumped and the papers flew from his hands.

"Sorry," I muttered under my breath when he looked at me, annoyed. "Lysander said you requested my presence, Mr. President?" I teased him and he gave me another annoyed look before letting out a deep sigh.

"This came for you," He handed me a package while looking over the papers again. I frowned when I took the package. Nathaniel never looked at me, he never wanted to make eye contact with me and I don't understand why.

"Thanks," I took the package under my arm and headed back outside to find Castiel and Lysander still there.

"_Red, my love." My eyes slowly met his and I couldn't help but smile seeing his face. "My love, my dearest," The back of his hand grazed my cheek and trailed down to my neck, "What would I ever do without you here?"_

"_You'd probably be dead in a ditch," I spoke sarcastically and soft. "Dominic, my sweet boy," I smiled, taking the joint from his mouth, I placed it in between my lips. "I fall for you everyday, and I will always be yours." I snatched the lighter from his hand, the small flame filled enough light for us to see each other. "Forever, and ever." I whispered._

"Earth to Akira?" A hand waved in front of my face, I jumped surprised out of my dazing mind. "Are you alright?" My heart was beat so fast and hard that I couldn't speak. "What do you have there?" Castiel asked, taking the package from my arm.

"Why would someone send you something to the school?" Lysander questioned. I had shrugged off the thought, it might had been from my parents who forgot my address.

"Probably my parents," I took back the package and started to open it. "They sometimes forget my apartment address," I shook my head in disapproval. "Some parents," I mumbled under my breath.

I reached my hand in and pulled out a long white piece of fabric; my heart stopped beating. I was speechless, shocked and horrified, the feelings took over my body.

"A scarf?" I shook my head, this wasn't just a scarf.

I dropped the packaging on the floor and held the scarf tightly in my trembling hands. I started to feel dizzy, light headed and sick; the kind of sick that made me want to disappear forever.

"Why do you look like you've seen a ghost?" Because I have. Castiel tried to grab it from my heads but I tugged back hard. "Wait, this blood?" He picked up the opposite end and examined the red spots and splatters on it.

My body felt heavy, my knees shook and legs jelly along with my vision starting to blur. I took in a deep sharp breath that stung my chest and then woke up in the nurses office, dazed and confused. Had that all just happened? I tried shaking the picture from my mind and sat up right.

"My fucking head." I groaned in pain, gently rubbing the back of my head where the pain was coming from and flinched at the touch. My right hand rubbed against the bed sheets and grabbed onto a different kind of fabric, I clenched onto it and threw it on the ground.

"Good to finally see you awake," Lysander's voice entered the room. "How are you feeling?"

"My head is throbbing," I mentioned. "What's that in your hand?" I reached for the folded paper he held close to his chest.

"First, let me ask something." I brought my hand back, placing at my side. "Do you remember what happened?" I nodded slightly, but stopped and looked up at him. "You passed out, hit your head on the ground and when Castiel brought you here, I found this letter in that package;" he paused, adverting his eyes away from me and sighed deeply. "Akira, who is Dominic?"

"No one," I said quickly, clenching the blanket on my lap. "He's no one," I sighed, I looked back at Lysander and smiled, it was a fake one but I didn't like when Lysander was this serious about something. He would get this look in his eyes, in his expression, I didn't like it because I felt like he could see right passed me. "Stop looking at me like that!" I snapped, throwing the blankets off of me, I didn't mean too, it had just happened.

"You can't let Red get the best of you," He said dropping the letter onto my lap.

Red? What did Red have to do with this? Did he think that outburst was from her...? Was that outburst from her?

I shook out the thought and opened the letter, mumbling a sorry. I stared down at the paper, I didn't read it, I wasn't prepared to read it.

_'Just read it already'_ I picked up my head and looked at Lysander, that wasn't his voice. I looked back down at the letter and took in a deep breath.

"_You said you were mine forever, and you know I don't like to be lied too, Red. Look forward to being with me forever again."_

_-Dominic, your one and only_

I swallowed and my hands started to shake again. A wave of angry and fear washed over me, I crumpled the paper and tore it to pieces.

"Who's Dominic, Akira?" For a moment I thought I had been alone, forgetting that Lysander was here as well.

"He's no one," I didn't want to tell him the truth, how could I tell someone that the man who almost killed me and ruined my life was out to find me, no, that he had already found me? "He's, he's," I was at a lose for words, my mind was pulling blank cards. "I have to get away from here," Anxiety rushed in me and I quickly jumped off the bed. "I need a smoke," I grabbed my boots and bag in one arm and pulled Lysander outta the room with the other. "You didn't tell Castiel about the note, did you?"

"No,"

"Good, you know how he gets." I was on the verge of tears once again, my breathing was unstable and I shook violently again.

"Akira, stop." Lysander placed down his feet, bring me to a halt. "You need to breath, you're shaking." I shook my head and turned to him, the tears already cascading down my face. "Akira," He placed a gentle hand on my shoulder and I fell onto him, holding him while I cried out silently.

"I-I'm scared Lysander," The scene was all too familiar to us, it first happened when Deborah caused all her chaos with Castiel, now it was happening again because of chaos that's happening with me. "Dominic, he's someone no one wants to mess with, he manipulative and crazy, and nothing can stop him once he sets his mind to something, he has his mind set on me, nothing will stop him." I pulled away from him and wiped the tears from my face. "There's something I need to show you," I walked with him into the basement and closed the door, locking it so no one could bother us.


End file.
